Married at 16, Mother at 17 and Widowed by 25: Tale of an Empowered Woman on Mother’s Day

She is a mother. A single parent of a 16-year-old daughter and a crusader against child marriage. She never went to school but is a strong voice to promote girls’ education in her community. 

Thirty-three-year-old, Sultana (name changed), who works at a pickle factory in the Varanasi district of Uttar Pradesh, believes education is the strongest weapon to empower her daughter.

What promoted an uneducated mother to push for the education of her daughter and every girl in her community?

The answer lies embedded in the numbers from a global report that suggests ‘India is home to 223 million child brides’. Sultana is one of them. 

She was barely 16 when she was married off to a man almost twice her age. Her husband, 40, a weaver from the Varanasi bribed Sultana's maternal uncle to marry her. As she hailed from an economically deprived family, Sultana had no other option but to marry this man, who already had nine children from his previous marriage.

Life was not at all easy for her post-marriage. She not only had to perform household chores for the entire family but had to face an abusive husband every day. Sultana was a minor when she conceived her first child. Unfortunately, her weak body couldn't bear the complications of pregnancy. Sultana suffered a miscarriage within a year of her marriage. The following year, she had Nayla (name changed).

When Nayla was just eight years old, her father passed away, and his family threw Sultana and her daughter out of the house. Sultana was forced to live in makeshift houses and do household chores to survive.

 "I was too young to understand the implications of child marriage and how society would treat me. After we were thrown out of the house we shifted from one slum area to another but no one extended any support to us. Later, we both got work at a local pickle factory but the money was not even sufficient to afford decent meals for two persons," said Sultana.

Eventually, Sultana met workers from a Varanasi-based child rights organisation Shambhunath Research Foundation (SRF).

When the team of SRF, a partner organisation of Child Rights and You (CRY), learned about their situation, they immediately contacted Sultana's husband's first family and restored both mother and daughter to their home.

Though Sultana survived the atrocities and adverse situations in her life, she didn't want her daughter or any other girl in the community to face the kind of suffering that she had gone through. To stop child marriages in her community, she became part of an alert group run by SRF in Varanasi, which helps families facing situations similar to hers. The community-led alert groups confront the perpetrators of child marriage, work to ensure girls at risk are returned to their families and involve authorities if necessary. In the last three years, these alert groups have prevented 107 child marriages in urban Varanasi.

Sultana's daughter Nayla has turned 16 this year. When Sultana recalls the horrific life when she was 16, she becomes even more determined to give a better life to her daughter. The SRF-CRY team encouraged to send Nayla, a dropout for the last eight years, to Sandhya Shala.  Through Sandhya Shala's activities like life skills and gender training, Nayla has evolved into an extremely creative and confident girl.

Despite facing difficulty in getting back to school, the SRF-CRY team advocated for her, resulting in her admission to class VII. Nayla has already received a scholarship of Rs 7,200 through the Bal-Shramik Vidya Yojna, a child labour re-enrollment scheme that provides Rs 1,200 per month. Nayla wants to continue her education and Sultana is determined to make all the dreams of her daughter come true.

The life of this mother-daughter duo is an inspiration for many. They both are leading their lives with their heads held high and have now dedicated their lives to motivating other girls to raise their voices against child marriage and complete their education to pursue their dreams. What Sultana could not achieve in life, she wants to see her daughter win.

On Mother’s Day, this mother’s story is a message of hope, empowerment, and the triumph of the indomitable spirit of womanhood as well as motherhood.

The author is the Regional Director of Child Rights and You (CRY) and is also serving as an external
resource person in The POSH committee of Expedia India. The views are personal.